A certain zoo had acquired a very rare species of gorilla. Within a few weeks, the female gorilla became very ornery, and difficult to handle.
Upon examination, the zoo veterinarian determined the problem. The gorilla was in heat. To make matters worse, there were no male gorilla species available.
While reflecting on their problem, the zoo administrators noticed Mike, an employee responsible for cleaning the animals' cages. Mike, it was rumoured, possessed ample ability to satisfy any female, and he wasn't very bright. And so, the zoo administrators reckoned they might have a solution.
Perhaps they could entice Mike to satisfy the female gorilla. Mike was approached with a proposition: would he be willing to screw the gorilla for five hundred bucks? Mike showed some interest, but he would have to think the matter over carefully.
The following day, Mike announced that he would accept their offer, but only under three conditions. "First," he said, "I don't want to have to kiss her. "Secondly, I want nothing to do with any offspring that may result from this union."
The zoo administration quickly acceded to these conditions, but what could be Mike's third condition?
"Well," said Mike, "You've gotta give me another week to come up with the five hundred bucks."